Getting Ready for a 20 Year Reunion

Well, I mentioned it last week, but I’m getting ready to head off on a 20 year reunion with girlfriends from college.

We chose Arizona because it happened to promise good weather and a central meeting place for most of us to reach.  It also had girls we hoped to see living there already, so it was a perfect choice.

Honestly, there were other people we would have liked to invite to join us, but it came down to the practical number of 5 — 5 people will fit in a rental car and we could likely squish 5 girls into a hotel room.

So we kept it at five and anybody who might be in that area — but hey, if you’re in Arizona and want to meet up on Saturday, let me know!

I have to say, my friend Stephanie and my husband John were the ones who convinced me to keep moving forward when I began to waiver about the trip.  I just wasn’t sure I should spend the money and take that time away from my family.  So grateful for the two of them.

The funny thing is that my friend Stephanie pretty much used to hate me.  She really did.  Like most introverts, I didn’t have the skills of reaching out to people I didn’t know. I’ve since learned to get out of my comfort zone and at least try.

Back then, I often looked away from people I didn’t know in hallways and around campus — and my friend Stephanie was convinced I was the biggest snob around.  She used to give me the death stare, and I’d think, “what is that girls problem?”

It’s so funny now when I think about it, but that was our first moments of knowing each other.  Just goes to show you, first impressions can be dead wrong.

Well, time passed and we both ended up studying in Austria, and our big trip to Rome and Assisi was about to happen, and we both needed roommates.  Somehow — I’m not sure how — we ended up agreeing to be roommates for the trip.

I wasn’t entirely sure about the choice to be her roommate, buy my feelings on the matter began to change on our bus trip down to Rome.

You see, Stephanie comes from Italian parents, and she made friends with our Italian bus driver and talked away in Italian with him for hours on end on the way down to Rome.  They became buds.

It happened to be an overnight bus, and we all tried desperately to get some sleep.  As you can imagine, it wasn’t a very restful night.

And then, at the crack of dawn (literally the sun was just coming up over the horizon) we were all woken up by “Volare” blasting over the speakers.  Stephanie had convinced the bus driver to put in her Italian greatest hits, and she was now waking up every single person on that bus.

The shouts were not so charitable, and a weaker woman would have sheepishly turned off the tape and sulked away to a dark corner of the bus — but that was not Stephanie’s style — not at all.

She proceeded to clap and belt out the tunes and walk up and down the aisle to ensure not a single person was left sleeping.  I thought to myself, “this girl is kind of crazy, but I like her”.

We all need friends like that in our lives, don’t we?  We all need those people who get us out of our comfort zones and wake us up out of our lethargy so we can see how very beautiful this life of ours truly is.

As an aside, in retribution for this act, our friend Eric proceeded to write “kick me” on the back of her jacket over the next few hours of our trip.  He slowly gathered dust from the ground and with painstaking skill, finished the task before our arrival in Rome.

Perhaps we should have told her, but I believe it was a just punishment for her crimes.

I could tell so many hilarious stories about each one of these amazing ladies — but I have to restrain myself, as I haven’t even packed yet!  More stories for another day.

It is funny, the things you think about when about to see friends after 20 years.  I must admit, I did ask myself last week whether one week of crunches would make up for 20 years of “not crunching”.  I think I know the answer to that one.

We’ve all had some babies and a lot of years since the last time we have been together. There is a humility in saying, “yep, I’m not going to look as good as I did 20 years ago” but hopefully my heart will make up for all the things that have gone south these last 20 years. 🙂

Being a woman who is growing older is hard in a “selfie” culture — but, darn it, if it isn’t good for the soul.  The truth is, as the body ages, our focus can slowly turn inward and outward.  Inward on the soul and Christ’s dwelling within it — and outward on the amazing people He has given to us to love.

I mean, I haven’t given up, but the process of aging has slowly allowed me to say, “hey, this body is as good as it’s gonna get — but this soul, this heart — the possibilities are endless”.

The beauty that is contained within our hearts can and should continue to grow until the day we die.  The beauty of the body — well, it’s a fleeting thing — but hey, at least there’s those glorified bodies we have to look forward to.  Can I get an, Amen?

Which reminds me of the the Scripture that has been a big part of my Lent thus far.  It comes from Colossians 3:

“Clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience.

Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.  

And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called into one body.”

While I gather my clothes and makeup and other things for this trip, I am trying to remember that we are all different than those girls from 20 years ago, but I like to think that we’re better than we once were.  I’d like to think we’ve been sub-consciously trying to live out the words of Colossians 3.

I like to think that with the sufferings and hardships and joy and love that we have experienced these past 20 years, that we have become better women — more the woman that we were meant to be — and that we’ll quickly look beyond the wrinkle here or gray hair there and see amazing women that have grown better these past 20 years.

I also like to imagine the advice that my 60 something self would give to my 40 something self — because I think that 60 year old self would be telling me to cherish my 40s and my 50’s and to see the beauty of this life that I live with young kids still in the house and older kids about to leave.

If I could go back even further and tell that girl in Austria of the beauty of the life that she would live.  I would assure her that the man she would marry, so different from the type of man she thought she would marry, and those children she never even imagined she would have — they would be some of the greatest gifts of her life.

I wish I could tell her that all those things she was worrying about then would somehow work themselves out for good — if only I could go back and tell her all of that.

But I can’t go back, and I must say I don’t really care to go back to that time.  I am so grateful for this life I never imagined I would have.  I am so grateful for all of it — even the bad stuff — because it has brought me to today.

Besides, life is not about wishing the past upon us, but rather looking forward with hope to the future. So yeah, I’m getting excited about my reunion coming up, but ya know, it will be over almost before it begins.

One day, this life will end, too — but if we stay close to God, we have the most amazing reunion we could ever imagine to look forward to.

There will be some old friends and lots of new friends and that celebration will never, ever end.  I’m looking forward to that day, and I hope you are too — because it is going to be amazing!