How Are We Christians Doing With That “They Will Know You By Your Love” Thing?

By this all men will know that you are My disciples — if you love one another.”

John 13:35

Hate to admit it, but as I scroll down my various social media feeds, I find myself wondering how we Christians are doing with that whole “they will know you by your love” thing?

Is it safe to say, “not so well”?😬

The good news, though, is that in real life I’d give us all a much higher grade — because in real life, I think we’d say about half the things we do when we’re typing away on our keyboards.

It’s just the nature of the beast, as they say.

But here’s the thing: we don’t have to live by the petty rules of petty people. We don’t have to give in to the anger, hatred, and negativity we see and sometimes experience online.

In fact, Jesus is calling us to a better way.

He is calling us to Love the people on those screens and our feeds.

I don’t believe social media is really the place to hash out our differences. I truly believe we should be having those discussions and arguments about what matters — just not on social media for the whole world to see.

I have seen very little fruit and way too much damage caused by Christians trying to hash out their differences on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram.

To be clear, I firmly believe that real unity can not be achieved without the difficult conversations, but social media is not designed to make fruitful dialogue happen — prove me wrong.

We need to re-discover the beauty of working out our differences in the spaces where it is appropriate.

Look at all the great minds throughout the history of the world — and you will find dialogue and discourse. In fact, sometimes truth would not have been discovered without that dialogue!

So don’t misunderstand me. We should be discussing the difficult things. The problem is that there are limitations when you’re typing away at a keyboard.

The limitations of social media means that often things are said that cause emotions to run high, feelings to be hurt, and more harm done then good.

The world is watching while Christians — we who claim to believe in the transforming power of Jesus’ love and forgiveness — fight just like everybody else on their newsfeeds and com boxes.

In these scenarios of which I speak, dialogue doesn’t actually happen. Progress isn’t actually made.

Fighting happens. Division grows. Our Church is hurt.

It’s scandalous, really. It’s wrong because Jesus told us specifically to “go first to our brother (or sister) and speak to them”.

Which is why we need person-to person-encounters — or at the very least, private discussions, phone calls or (heck if you want to be really crazy!!) maybe even a hand-written letter!

So don’t be afraid to hash things out — just do it in the appropriate place.

True, sometimes we may need to publicly call out those “theologians and influencers” who are publicly misrepresenting the faith — but first, the Christian should go to them privately and correct them in love.

Then, if they don’t change, you may prayerfully decide whether you must do more.

That takes a real love for “our enemy” — a love we get with prayer and fasting and growing in knowledge of our faith.

It is why we need to get back to Masses and lively discussions and debate — it is why we need to bring back in-person encounters in our homes, over meals, and in public spaces.

Make them happen, people!

Don’t forget our entire faith is based on in-person encounters. Sacraments can’t happen without in-person encounters. Mass can’t happen. Absolution can’t be given.

We are an “incarnational” faith — which means Jesus chose to come to Earth as Man and continues to make himself fully present to us in our Sacraments and in His followers.

God didn’t randomly establish a Church that required in-person encounters — He did it because He knows us better than we know ourselves.

God knew that we needed to be with other people in order to fully realize our humanity. God also knew that encountering others is a powerful way to encounter Him in them.

So do not underestimate the importance of in-person encounters. Don’t think for a moment that a virtual reality can deliver any of the benefits that real human interaction can deliver.

It is in community that we are given opportunities to actually love people and put all those things we have learned and heard from the pulpit into action.

Does that mean we give up all cyber interactions? Good question.

Personally, I think social media can be a means of introducing others to Christ — to invite others to get to know Jesus and accept His freedom.

I also believe God is calling some Christians to go into the deep recesses of the internet and share God’s truth and love in those spaces.

But it isn’t necessarily a good thing for everybody — in fact, it can be damaging to one’s faith.

One thing I do know, God would never call you to the mission territory of the internet of it would result in you losing your own soul in the process. So beware.

Seek God first. Love the people around you. Stay steeped in the Sacraments — and only then, examine your place in these spaces we call the internet.

Then do the difficult self-examination of evaluating your words and actions in these spaces.

If people would be hard-pressed to identify you as a Christian by your words on your social media accounts, then now is the time to change that!

And for the love of all that is good in this world, please stop sharing your unfiltered emotions for the world to see.

Emotions are a gift from God — but they need time to be refined. If we don’t take the time to pray over and refine our emotions, they will only add to the chaos, venom and noise that is filling our social media feeds.

So take that time.

And I totally get that it’s not always easy to rise above the darkness and pettiness — but darn it, who said being a Christian was going to be easy? Not Jesus! Not the Saints!

So don’t expect “easy” — but do expect Jesus to pour out his grace on you and to give you His Holy Spirit to help you overcome the darkness and to Be the Light — even when it’s difficult.

Especially then! We call that grace — and it’s for real.

So keep leaning on Jesus. Keep striving to be the Light! Let your love be the witness the world needs to see right now.