The Future Isn’t “Female”. The Future Isn’t “Male”. The Future is Family and It Always Has Been.

There is a dangerous CULT OF SELF that seems to be growing, and it sees the other as the “enemy”.

We see it in slogans that try to pin men and women against each other. Slogans like “the future is female” or “toxic masculinity” or movements that want to downgrade the importance of FATHERS in the home or attack women who CHOOSE to stay home — frankly they’re not solving any problems.

They are only making THEM WORSE!

Because here’s the thing: we can never find fulfillment in the pursuit of SELF and the CANCELING of others .

The pursuit of SELF LEADS TO SELFISHNESS, WHICH ULTIMATELY LEADS TO COMPLETE AND UTTER MISERY.

And I get that some women have been hurt by men and vice verse — but we simply won’t find healing by denying the fact that we were created to work in a loving partnership with each other and to BRING ABOUT A CIVILIZATION OF LOVE.

We can begin to understand that in FAMILY. It is in family where we learn to give of ourselves, we learn to sacrifice for another and we learn that selfishness leads to everybody’s misery. 

It is in family that we begin to turn outside of ourselves and learn to really LOVE ANOTHER.

Which is why we need to return to FAMILY. God came to Earth to restore our hearts and to redeem our relationships — and ultimately to bring us into HIS FAMILY, too.

So let’s stop pitting men and women against each other. Let’s remember God’s original intention for family.

Any society that forgets the importance of family is DOOMED! The State can never save us and will only enslave us if family is not raised up as more important than itself. Look at history and you’ll know that to be true. Ignore history and you are bound to repeat it. 

I guess what I’m trying to say is that the FUTURE is FAMILY and it always has been.

So let us build up the family! Let’s shore up FAMILIES and support them, because ultimately as the family goes, so goes our society.

As Mother Teresa said, “If you want to change the world, go home and love your families”. I believe that to be true, and I think that we need to examine deeply our own attitudes on the importance of family and re-orient our lives to make family a priority.

In fact, in my own life, I have found it extremely helpful to change my attitude from a “me-centered” approach to a “we-centered” approach.

What I mean by that is that instead of focusing on “my hopes and my dreams for myself” what if we began to change our focus to “our hopes and dreams as a family” — to allow our individual dreams to expand so that they can fit our family in them?

This little change might look like as simple as creating time for family adventures or even little pilgrimages to experience Holy places and the life of a pilgrim together. Honestly, that shift in our own family “hopes and dreams” has led to some amazing adventures as a family!

As much as John and I loved to travel together before our kids, we love the adventure of traveling to these holy places AS A FAMILY.

We wouldn’t trade it for anything and it has changed us as a family — drawn us closer together and given us more moments of laughter and closeness because we chose to include our kids in our “dreams” instead of just pursuing individual goals.

Another example of this is that as a family we really try to emphasize the importance of faith and our ultimate goal to make it to Heaven.

All of our choices are colored by this “hope and dream” for our family. More than seeing our kids make it in the world as “influencers” or CEO’s or to make lots of money or acquire lots of things, we are trying to foster an understanding that true success is doing the will of God, and we should orient our lives towards that goal above all others.

Ultimately, as a family, that means trying to foster a family prayer life and making time for the incredibly important family dinners with conversations that include talking about the REALLY BIG THINGS of life: Heaven, Hell and Eternity.

We regularly have lively discussions on theology and philosophy and current events — and though ultimately the choice for God comes down to an individual choice in each one of our kids — we’ve tried to make it clear why we believe choosing God and choosing to do His will is the most important choice we could make in life.

At the very least, we know that we have given our kids a little view into the Eternal and the importance of living for God and it’s up to them to choose whether or not they will do that.

As a family, faith is very important to us and as a family we often discuss our ultimate hope and dream that our entire family makes it to Heaven — we even make it a prayer intention most every night and now our kids often include it in their intentions.

I guess what I’m trying to say is make time for the big discussions, make time for prayer and work to keep yourself and your kids oriented towards Heaven.

Make Heaven your “True North”!

Let that TRUE NORTH influence your decisions more than anything else, and you are going to be okay — better than okay, because you’ll be living for God and all those others things will work themselves out.

No matter what the world throws at our kids, we can show them a different way. Yes, they must choose that way for themselves, but our job is to make the introduction, to put their hands in Jesus’ hands and into the hands of their Mama Mary, and then slowly step back.

That is what family is all about: people striving, people loving, and ultimately people cheering each other on to Heaven.

Our primary vocation as a family is to get each other to Heaven — and that is a beautiful calling, indeed! So keep your eyes on the true prize of Heaven!

Embrace the beautiful hopes and dreams of becoming a family that loves Jesus.

Let’s not leave the most important work of introducing our kids to Jesus in any one else’s hands. We have a very sacred duty in our hands: and it begins and ends with doing what we can to help our spouse and our kids to make it to Heaven where we will join the rest of God’s Family for an eternity of complete and utter happiness.

Let’s never lose sight of this most beautiful and sacred calling as a family and may God continue to bless us and guide us back to our ultimate HOME!