The Underestimated Power of SpendingTime With People (In Real Life)

Hello Everybody,

We are in the midst of finishing up school, plays, recitals and ALL THE THINGS May brings our way, so this will be a short one, but I just wanted to quickly discuss the power of spending time with people, IRL, as the kids say.

In Real LIfe (IRL) is an acronym that one will see quite a bit on social media. I remember a time when spending time with people was always IRL — every single time I said “I spent time” with somebody, it meant I was in the same room, talking and eating, laughing and maybe even arguing over things that matter.

In many sectors of society, we now have to clarify IRL, because spending time with somebody could mean a person “zoomed” and stared at millions of light-filled pixels that represented somebody and sound waves that mimicked the voice of that same person.

With good old Zuckerberg in control of the “Metaverse” we now have the limits of technology being pushed to extreme measures — we’ve even been told there is new technology in which you can create a realistic avatar of yourself to remain and have convos with your loved ones after you have left this world for the next.

Sounds horrifying, and also, how exactly would the metaverse know the conversations I’d have with my kids and loved ones? No doubt, if they had anything to do with it, it would be a short one because they’d censor all the Catholic stuff because it “violates community standards”.

They’ve already banned this blog, pretty sure they wouldn’t let my avatar say what they won’t let me say over on FB and Insta…but I digress.

Try as all those (often emotionally and morally bankrupt) billionaire tech giants might, to convince us that IRL is just one way to be with somebody and have meaningful relationships — I think most of us know the truth.

*Parents, best word of advice is keep your kids off of social media for as long as possible.*

We know that real, deep and meaningful relationships come from spending time with somebody IN REAL LIFE. We know that phone calls and zoom calls and even social media connections are great ways to stay connected when we are apart, but they can not lead to the depth of a relationship that happens in real life.

I love the family and friend text chains. I love the occasional phone call. To be honest, I hate Zoom, but can see how others like that technology as well — but I know that if I want deep and meaningful relationships they have to move beyond the cyber world.

There is no replacing the laughter, the hugs, the breaking of bread and sharing a cup of coffee or wine together — no replacement!

So make time to connect with people in real life. Sacrifice for those moments and opportunities if you have to, but make them happen.

Let’s be honest for a minute. Seeing somebody on a screen can be safer. Putting a nice filter on our faces before we post a video can make us “look better” or like we have life put together — but the truth of the matter is that real life is messy.

Real life has wrinkles and bumps in the road and arguments and reconciliations. Real life has belly laughs and deep, painful cries. Real life has people who don’t like you and people you don’t like, but it also has people who can’t live without you and people you don’t want to live without.

Real life shows us all of our flaws, and who wants to see those flaws?! But it is in living and interacting with real people in real life that we can actually GROW TO BE BETTER THAN WE ONCE WERE.

So make time for real life and real people and be prepared to not always put your best foot forward in real life. Be prepared to make mistakes and hurt feelings and wish you could take back something you did or said.

That “delete” button could come in handy in real life, but there is no “delete” in real life. There is only words like, “I am sorry” and “please forgive me” and “I love you”, and at the end of the day, we must accept the messiness of life that can help us to become those Saints God created us to be, IN REAL LIFE.

So when in doubt, choose Real Life.

When in doubt, choose the messiness of life over the filters. When in doubt, choose to love the people around you, to the best of your abilities — if you can do this, then looking back on your life, you will see just HOW BEAUTIFUL your real life was after all.