Why It’s Important to Just Be

Two years ago I wrote about a hilarious mishap that happened to our family while taking a hike before sunrise.

Sure, the backdrop was Florence, which is pretty extraordinary, but the point of the post was that quality time can happen anywhere — absolutely anywhere — and you don’t need to go off to far off places to make those moments happen.

In fact, I think that it’s imperative that you go out of your way to find little family adventures in your own neck of the woods.  And these moments don’t require exotic, “insta-worthy” locations or piles of money to make it happen.

Any backyard barbecue or fire pit can set the stage for moments that you will remember fondly.  It doesn’t have to be complicated.

The point is that we all need to stir up our sense of adventure and just get out and “be” — just be with our family and the people we love.

Quality time, quite often comes in the middle of quantity time. It often appears in the midst of doing ordinary things with the people we love.

In fact, I think that having a bunch of kids is almost guaranteed to deliver funny little moments in the middle of an ordinary day, but that’s all the more true when we just put a little more effort into making special moments for our family.

Which brings us to last weekend.  It was Memorial Day.  It’s a day to remember the sacrifices of the brave and self-less men and women who have fought for our freedom.

It also kicks off summer for most of us in the Midwest and so that means we all pack into the beaches and get our sunburns — it just wouldn’t quite feel like summer if we’re not covered in sand and mosquito bites by the end of the day.

Honestly, it’s a bit too crowded for this introverted girl to handle the lakes or pools on most Memorial Days — but I was determined that we would commemorate this day with a little family adventure.

As John is always up for family adventures, I had the best partner to make it happen.  But even so, getting 6 kids ready for the beach is enough to suck all the life out of a person.  So, we had to have a plan or we were likely to give up before the adventure even began.

Resistance is real, people.  I always experience it before almost every one of my fondest family adventures.  So, be prepared for resistance.

When resistance hits, remember to stay strong, stay the course and keep moving forward.  Trust me on this one.  Beautiful moments are on the other side of it.

So, the plan was have an early dinner, pack up our canoe, and go off to a secluded beach that is typically inhabited by laid-back granola-types — kind of my favorite people to share a beach with.

I must admit, the prospect of packing 6 kids is hard enough — we also had the hassle of getting a canoe to stay on top of our car.  We almost turned back, but we muscled through.

My best advice is to fight that resistance, and as quickly as you can,  jump in that car and let the adventure begin!  A few loud hoots and hollers out the window doesn’t hurt either.

Once you get past all that preparation, it’s usually smooth(ish) sailing from there.  It will be worth it in the end.

I really love this little gem of a lake.  There are no motorized boats allowed and it’s a relaxed environment surrounded by lovely, serene views.   So peaceful.

Little gems like this are everywhere, and I recommend finding some granola-type people and ask them to recommend little spots like this one. They always seem to know the best spots.

Plus they also don’t seem to mind nursing babies and kids being kids — so yay for the crunchy people of this world!

Places like these can provide truly life-giving moments.  These are the moments we get to be with the people we love and to be reminded just how darn amazing they are.  They are precious, indeed.

And yes, I must admit, I have an unfounded fear of water in which I can’t see the bottom.  I blame it all on Jaws — but I even had a chance to face those fears and rescue my toddler from God knows what in a dark corner of the lake.

It took everything in me to not run away from him, but I did a pretty good job of pretending like there was nothing to be afraid of.  Fake it till you make it, people.

These are the moments that pull us out of our little boxes — the boxes we make for ourselves and the boxes we find ourselves in due to the circumstances and obligations of our lives.

I know I always come back with a fresh perspective on things, and getting the whole family away from screens and air-conditioning and artificial lighting is like a balm for the soul.

We need these moments out in nature to remind us of our humanity — we really do.

Interestingly, these moments can also present some challenges.   It seems one of the greatest challenges in the modern age is learning to document those precious moments, without letting it impede you from being truly present in the moment.

For me, I have learned a simple process.  For about 10 minutes of my time, I get out my phone and snap pictures and videos of little things that strike me, and then I put that phone away and just leave it there.

In fact, sometimes I consciously decide not to document certain moments.  Take our canoe ride, for example.  I decided not to document any of it and tried my best to sear the memory in my brain.

I just sat there with my baby and my five year old and let John and my middle son paddle us through this beautiful maze of wildlife and aquatic plants and did my best to soak it all in.

We even canoed under a bridge which was exactly like the bridge that Gilbert proposed to Ann in the Anne of Green Gables the Sequel movie.  I was tempted to take a picture, but nope — just soaked it in and reminded John and the kids about that scene.

It was lovely.  A lovely little moment where I looked at my growing boy, getting so strong — strong enough to paddle his mom and little siblings down this beautiful waterway of wildlife and flora — and I tried my best to be fully present to it because I knew he wasn’t always going to be available to canoe his mom around.

And as I looked at our older kids, as they took their turn adventuring on the canoe, I knew that they wouldn’t always be at home with us either.

I knew that, slowly, they were beginning to step away from us — just a little bit — because God never meant for them to stay at home forever.  No, they have a life ahead of them, a life which will slowly involve less of us and more of other people.

So on this day, I was going to try my best to be aware of the blessing that they were to us and the blessing they were meant to be for others, as well.

So I guess the moral of the story is that we need these moments in our lives.  We need to slow down and “just be” with the ones that we love — be present, be grateful, and be adventurous.  There you have it, the three “be’s” of a happy family life in a nutshell.

So that is the goal of this summer — to work on the three “Be’s”.  I want to look back on this summer and say that, indeed, I was more present, more grateful, and more adventurous than I was at the start of it.

Hoping that this little post about our day together might inspire you to seek out the people you love and “just be” with them, too, this summer.

I’ll end with a few sounds of summer to give you a little encouragement to go out there and live your own family adventures this summer.

It would not be complete without the sounds of rippling water, excited children, a bird singing, and even a little bit of whining mixed in there.  Fourteen seconds of summer to get you motivated.

 

Sharing over at Kelly’s